Approval addiction will wrap you up like a spiritual spiderweb and destroy your freedom, joy and service. It’s deadly to a fulfilling life in Christ. In this excerpt from my book in progress on living out of divine affirmation, I describe what approval addiction is and offer an often neglected spiritual discipline to combat it. Next week, we’ll get into more elements of that spiritual discipline.
One of my best-selling books is When to Walk Away: Finding Freedom from Toxic People. I’ve openly admitted that I was perhaps the least qualified person to write that book, as I have a pathetic lifelong record when dealing with toxic people. I’m too weak. But my weakness in this area made me sensitive to the need for the truth the book espouses. I saw what a lack of wisdom in that area was doing to me and my ministry, and the journey toward writing that book (which began with a single sermon and grew from there) was God’s buoy, helping me stay afloat in the ocean of craziness that toxic people can represent.
Another great weakness of mine is approval addiction, which is at the heart of this book. Approval addiction is measuring my self-worth according to the approval or criticism of the “wrong others.” I say “wrong” because I should seek to listen to the approval or criticism of God; His opinion is the only one that matters. I am to consider the opinions of others through a God grid: criticism that helps me gain a better understanding of God’s judgment should be considered and heeded; approval that overcomes God’s needling of my conscience should be run from.
When I read a chapter on secrecy from John Ortberg’s book, The Life You’ve Always Wanted: Spiritual Disciplines for Ordinary People, I was spiritually slain in the best possible sense. I saw my sin. I saw my enslavement. And then I grasped a few spiritual practices that could help me—and perhaps, help you—leave this imprisoning sin behind.
Continue reading this blog over on Substack HERE.
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