Divorce for nonbiblical reasons breaks my heart. I’ve seen the pain it causes children, spouses, extended family, friends, and churches. It’s so sad. But churches that sin against divorced people also break my heart. I’ve seen people who all but had divorce forced on them shut out and disqualified for future ministry. Let’s remember that not every divorce is equal, lest we sin against those who should be released.
Christine was in bad shape: five feet seven inches tall, yet she weighed just ninety-eight pounds. Even so, every time she lifted a potato chip to her face her husband Rick said, “Sure you want to eat that?”
Christine wasn’t sure why Rick cared what she ate. They hadn’t had sex for eight years, though Christine had tried everything she could to interest him, including strip teases, bubble baths, candlelight dinners, and “everything short of standing on my head in the corner to get him to look at me.” Others called them “Ken and Barbie” but Christine began to feel like the ugliest woman on the planet. Rick preferred pornography and eventually even prostitutes to a real wife.
Believing that a “dutiful Christian wife” must endure such disrespect, Christine pressed on. They went to thirteen counselors in seven years. Christine wore herself out trying to get her marriage to work, but one fateful Christmas morning, Rick told Christine, “I don’t love you anymore and I want a divorce.” To be honest, Christine felt relief. As a Christian, she had tried everything she could think of to “fix” her marriage. Having it taken out of her hands felt like a giant burden had been lifted until Rick added, “The truth is, I think you’re sick, and I’m going to have you committed.”
Christine replied, “Rick, it’s not my head that’s sick; it’s my heart. You’ve killed me from the inside out. I’m not sick in the head, I’m worn out.”
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